It's just lunch

However it was the best one I had in a while. Food, conversation, company, you name it. Very nice. Cafe Fresco is high on the recomendo list. I am looking forward to the the Pan-Asian joint that is going in across the street soon.
Big weekend race-wise for me this weekend. IC Lite & the real deal IC V. I rarely say I am gunning for the win in a race, however this is one where I am gunning for it. IC V has a 40+ category this year & I plan on going head to head w/ Applegate. He is a prior National Champ and prior IC winner outright. My plan is to be on him like white on rice. I am busting out the go big or go home tire selection for Sunday. Vittoria file treads. Yessireebob. I am rocking the files for a road advantage.
Food for thought from the original roughrider, Teddy Roosevelt.
"Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered with failure, than to take rankwith those spirits that neither enjoy much nor suffer much because they live in the grey twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."
An awesome quote, and an equally awesome run-on sentence.
I will dare.

Ohhhhh ffffffffudge

Except he did not say fudge. He said it, the Queen Mother of all swear words. Well actually I am he, and I did not even say it. As Steevo & I were warming up for the Hagerstown cross race yesterday, we happened upon a full-on BMX race track. Being the little kid that I am I could not resist. After a roll through I proceeded to the gates and did a lap. Well, almost a lap. I carried a bit too much speed into what I thought was a large tabletop double. Turns out it was a triple with the unknown bump right in the middle. Strategically placed to catch my front wheel as I aired over the front lip. Keeping in mind we are on cross bikes on a BMX track. Yep, I stacked it hard. I slammed into the third lip with my left shoulder and immediately thought broken collarbone, season is over. Well it is not broken based on my scientific touch test, however the pain is pretty freakin' bad.
Nonetheless let's race our bikes. Race starts a group of nine of us seperate quick. Then down to seven after each FORT guy has mechanicals. Together few some laps and I am thinking man, I can ride the front here. I hold back and keep a rhythm. US Army Gallegher attacks and dangles. Steevo goes after him a few laps later. As he guys I hit the front for a little over a lap to slow down our group of five. Steevo bridges. Long story short, Steevo is a stud and ends up second after some young kid bridges, sits on and then sprints. I feel the pain every time I get out of the saddle. This sucks on the 10 times up a short 42-27 pitch. Eventually NRC road stud Fader drills our group. I rool in 7th. My legs were good, but could not stand. I really feel the shoulder.
Fast forward to now. I did not really sleep because the pain went from dull to excruciating. Add to the fact that I roll around a great deal when I sleep, it was not good. I gave up the battle at 4:45. Yes, I will try to race today. The legs feel great. If the course allows me to stay seated, I will be good. If it has a lot of stnding to accelerate. I am in trouble. As much as my tailbone hurt last week. This is soooo much worse. As a point of reference. It hurts and is a strain to lift a coffee cup, what maybe two pounds.
This one will require a hospital visit later today or tommorow.

Cycling is easy...

...walking is friggin' hard. My hip and calf muscles are blown from walking at Interbike. Lower back is killing as well. Yes, I bet the tourists faired better than I, pain-wise. Lest it be known that Kessel & I walked approximately 10-12 miles on Tuesday, 15ish miles on Wednesday, and another 8-10 on Thursday. Colin what is the TSS score I need to enter for all that shit?
The end result was tiredeness, but not enough to get any real shut-eye on the Thursday red-eye. Got home Friday morning to 2-3 hours sleep & a ton a unpacking and bike work to get some cross bikes rideable.
I finally fell asleep at 11:00 Friday. Two, three hours of sleep in thirty-six. This is where a certain person would be impressed, I slept THIRTEEN straight hours, and woke today at noon. SWEET! Now it is time to go out and see if my 'cross season will happen, or to what extent it will happen.
Coolest thing at Interbike. The homeless guy at the Palazzo. His sign read, "Ninja's killed my father, need money for karate lessons."

At the movies

More on that later.
I had some people over Saturday to christen the new patio, fire pit, and generally have a good ole time. There is something about grilling in 90 degree heat that makes it lose its fun. So as the sun finally set along with Michigan & Notre Dame's seasons, the patio became a very pleasant place to hang.
Quick background, when I purchased my house in May, the owner had already excavated the area to put in a patio. He was transferred before he could finish it. Being that I am the type that knows damn well when I am in over my head, I hired someone to install the paver patio, walkway, firepit & landscaping. It was complete with a week to spare. Saturday was the first time to enjoy it. Enjoy it we did, grilled meats, good beers, nice fire and the coup de gras.
Dogdeball, the movie, was shown at the Hebe drive-in. I was mentioning to my friend's that I have an LCD projector from work that we use for presentations. I can run my laptop through the projector and shine the movie onto a space on my house about 15'x30'. Viola, instant big-screen/theatre size film. Another friend replies, "why don't you just use your neighbors house. There are no windows and you have the whole side of a two-story house. Then & there the Hebe drive-in was born. I set it up and after a brief 2002 Tour of Flanders interlude, we kicked back and watched Dodgeball on my neighbors house. It was awesome. Great friends, and family, food, beer, a little fire going for ambiance.
So they next projects are the infamous Wizard of Oz/Dark side of the moon pairing and maybe the 24 hr Chris Eatough documentary.
Sweet.

Lots of stuff

Hmmm. Lots of stuff since the last post.
I have seem to have found my road legs.
I am excited for cross.
My patio is finished, and it is awesome. Feel free to visit.
The divorce is finally final. Now it is time to take a good long honest look at who and where I am.
I turned 40 today. Happy birthday to me. That means my cross age is 47.
I am having a "Yes I am 40, thank you for being good friends" party Saturday. I can not wait.
My overall health is better. Hopefully the 9/7 appt. confirms that.
I overimbibed at Ray & Nancy's wedding and paid dearly for it.
I had a nice discussion with someone from my past, albeit brief and somewhat sad.
I have said too much at times.
I have bitten my tongue when I should have spoke.
I saw "the girls" last week. They are awesome.
I played with my best little friend, Gabby Miller, yesterday. She is great. I wish I had one just like her.
Vegas is coming up. I am psyched for Interbike.
It is time to Tatt up. Everything is final.
Hobbes is still fat, happy and lazy.
Bruster's is pretty damn good.
I am somewhat excited and ready to meet new people.
I am very scared and somewhat frightened by the same prospect.
I have not had the Blaze for two weeks. I miss her.
I have not had the Impala since Friday, good riddance.
Kia Rondo. Rock band, porn star or rental car? You decide.
Some people close to me have disappointed me with their actions. Not you, Ames.
Some people close to me have surprised me at how much they keep giving and giving.

CAR BACK!!!

After much driving around running bike errands yesterday I tried in vain to make a group ride in Mechanicsburg. I missed by 5 minutes. I took off guessing where they may be going, but to no avail. It was good anywho. JRA. Go hard when I felt like it, easy when I felt like it. Very nice, I like.
As I am in the middle of a hard effort, I approach the bottom of a rise. I see three riders in front of me near the top. Hmmm, yeah I will catch them on the downhill sweeper. I contact the engine room and the furnace responds. I am flying and the downhill is a sweeper left, then over some RR tracks. All of this at about 40ish. As I get closer to the riders I realize this may not be so smooth. Not being sexist here, there are some facts that are inevitable. Women do not decsend as well as men. Especially local training ride women. Now put the aformentioned ladies on TT BIKES and mission control we have a problem. Couple that with the fact that I can decend and corner with the best P 1,2 riders around. I come screaming to the left and the first lady starts to move left then shouts out to alert her two riding partners ahead of her. CAR BACK! Yes, she shouts up car back. In that moment the shit of Christiana faded away. Unfortunately the two ladies in front now decide to take the whole lane and grab handfuls of brake at the RR track. I swing left and double hop the the two sets of tracks and see a car approaching at me. Still enough time to move right and drill the little rise and finish off my hard effort.
I have been called a lot of things, some good and some bad, in my life. Until yesterday I was never called a car. I liked it.
Car back, and proceeding full speed ahead.

Personal best on the suckmeter

Yep, I did it today. A new PB on the suckmeter. Christiana RR. I could not finish off the climb to save my life. Am I tired, from Tuesday still? Am I tired from the two prior weeks of antibiotics? Was the fact that my chain would not stay put when I was out of the saddle in my mind? Probably yes to all three. However in this day and age of zero, zip, zilch, it could not have been my responsibility, lack of accountability. I will say that none of the aforementioned issues were the issue. I just plain sucked and gave up. Yep there it is. I feel like shit because I let myself down and I let my teammates down. There were at least fifteen to twenty guys behind me when I pulled the plug with 24 miles to go. I could have easily kept riding to live on to suck again tomorrow. However I could do it no longer. The suckmeter was pegged and the give-a-fuck guage was on "E".
So there you have it. As I said to my buddy Kyle, "it is amazing how a shitty day can really wreak havoc on a fragile mind and make you not want to race."

What does it take

What does it take to be a leadout rider? I have always related to guys like Lombardi, Sacchi, Steegmans, the Cipo train, the pre-Milram Pettachi train. It is impressive on a couple of fronts. What does it take to know you are so strong that no one can come around you, yet you will finish your race 600 meters from the finish? What about being a world class sprinter and your race ending 100 meters from the finish? What kind of discipline does it take to absolutely place 100% of your aspirations/talent aside for your sprinter? Secondly it is mutha f'in hard to do what those freaks do. Brett Lancaster railing for 1k at 33-35 mph. Then someone like Steegmans takes over from there and crushes the penultimate acceleration for 400 meters at probably 38-40 mph down to 150-200 to go. Then the Boonen, McEwen, Bennati, Pettachi's take over.
So that brings me to this. In the last five years I can count on both hands, maybe even one, where I have seen this happen in an amateur race. Why? Are we not willing to lay it down for a teammate? Do we not practice the drill together? Hard to say. Do you know how hard it is to explain to a non-cyclist that you pulled off at 200 meters to go, while leading, to let your teamate win? People do not get it. Whatever the reason, a lead-out is the ultimate example of teamwork, self-sacrifice, and pure joy when it all goes right.
So since I am back racing some road crits I have been working on leadouts a little bit. I have the physical end down. I think last week at Grandview I got the mental end down to. I knew where I had to get to and I did it. I put my aspirations aside because I knew my teammate is a better sprinter. I trust him and know he appreciates the effort. My race ended 300 meters from the finish and my teammate won the field sprint. Hopefully now I can repeat it, but a little faster.
What does a decent regional 1,2 leadout require? Based on some repeated training data, 500 meters at 35 mph. Those are the numbers. You can/do not look at a PowerTap while doing the effort. You just go as hard as you can then study the data later. The distance seems long enough to start a long way away and the speed is high enough that no one will want to waste energy in the wind. I will let you know how it goes when it matters.

Original work

Blah if you ask me, but I am too lazy to update presently.

Oh I want to believe
There is more to this me
Then it hits me that maybe there isn’t
All the things that I try
As a means to get by
Then it hits me that maybe its futile
Up and down round and round
Covering all new ground
Then it hits me that I’m not a martyr
Where to go, what to do
No more tea set for two
Then it hits me I’m starting all over
Oh to dare mighty things
Take a new set of wings
Then it hits me, a chance of a lifetime
Did I fail, did I learn
A new start for to yearn
Then it hits me the road is wide open
Chance to choose not to lose
Risk the win, payoff huge
Then it hits me, a change to my thinking
Break it down most anyway
Take a chance make it pay
Then it hits me, life is not complacent
Dollar earned penny saved
Live your life now be brave
Then it hits me, its time to get moving
All for me all for you
All for us what to do
Then it hits me, no one is all alone
Looking back if you will
Tough to take bitter pill
Now it hits me

New ink poll

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Mt Snow

After two weeks of no stomach issues, and a good taper, it all went to shit. Literally. I have been dealing with boo boo belly since January. The Protonix was great for two weeks then Blammo. The sure sign to trouble is how many times I can dispens egas from my netherregions after eating. Zero is healthy, that is what it was the past two weeks. Thirty friggin eight after a meal is unhealthy, pre-Protonix. Well Friday at Mt Snow was much closer to thirty-eight than zero. That was followed by enough trips to the bathroom Saturday (8) to read the Southern VT mag three times front to back before my race. I even threw in a sprint to the porta's while on the start line Todd Cassan must have been all kinds of perplexed.
To add insult to injury, my flawless performing bike threw the chain spokeside, not once but twice. Five full minutes to work it out. Seventh to butt-naked last then back to twelth. C'est la vie. I raced hard. Shorttrack was much of the same, minus the chain issues. Great start, then gapped. Twenty second solo bridge, then kablooey when the poo went down with three to go. At least I raced. Huge props to those who cheered. Zach, Ry, Wes, Meg and her friends. That was great.
My teammates totally kicked ass. Mike Yozell who is one of the best runners and bike handlers in 'cross schooled the MTB crew on a single. Natty friggin' champ. Yes, that made me happy. Mike deserved it.
Weston V the 14th was a total, I should be a pro rockstar. Second in the XC & a Natty friggin' champ in the STXC. Man was that fun watching that race unfold and give Wes info. AWESOME!
So that was Mt Snow. I dared mighty things and did not live in the twilight that knows not victory or defeat.

Two down one to go

As my loyal two dozen readers, that may be stretching it, know. I made the switch to MTB racing this year. I needed a break from the road. I enjoy the road, my team and teammates, however it was time for a change. Back in February/March, Ray Adams was kind enough to take me on the VisitPa.com Uberteam. Once he witnessed my mad skillz, how could he resist. As the saying goes, "it is just like riding a bike." The thing is, most people would not want to walk on the trails that I/we ride/race on.
Back to point. I stated two goals to Ray, if he would bring me on the team. I will win the series overall. I will win half of the races in the series. This may sound a little arrogant to some, but I had faith in my cycling fitness. I also knew my skill level will only keep increasing. I also kept one goal in my back pocket, per se. I want to be on the podium at Nationals. The stretch goal to that is the top step. Well I have achieved my first two goals, and then some. I have won all six XC events by pretty solid margins. I have also clinched the series. Now it is time for some personal redemption. I leave for Mt. Snow later today. I am fit. I can ride technical stuff as well as any 40+ rider out there. I am a fair 40+ climber. Saturday we will see how it goes. Before I roll to the race I will again read my lucky Chinese fortune cookie saying from Cross Nats (10th, out of 140ish). It is as follows: Imagine what great things you could achieve if you knew you could not fail.
I aim to make this simple. You either do or you do not. You either will or you will tonight. Trying is for the weak and insecure.
I DO plan on being on the podium. I WILL race my bike accordingly.
Well there it is, two down and one to go.

Belly redux

All is finally quiet on the belly front, literally. Those of the faint of heart non-bathroom rumor should skip the next sentence. The crescendo, literally, hit on July 4th. My arse had as many big bangs as the local fireworks. I counted, yes I counted, 38 blasts from my nether region in a space of four hours. The next day I started some medicine, Protonix, that inhibits gastric acid secretion. Since the first day on the med I have had NO stomach distention, bloating and gas issues. Hoo freakin' ray! My somewhat uninformed medical theorem on this is that my stomach is so laden with H Pylori, which was confirmed via biopsy, that it was working overtime to kill that bacteria. The downside is that H Pylori is the only bacteria that is unaffected by acid production. H Pylori bacteria thrive in that atmosphere and it literally digs deeper into the stomach lining. So as the H Pylori gets worse, the stomach produces more acid, then all that acid reacts very negatively with any foreign substance in the belly, aka food. Problem solved.
I will start a double course of antibiotics after MTB Nats to eradicate the H Pylori. Hopefully, all will be well by the beginning of August.
So for my faithful readers, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I can finally eat pain free, imagine that.
Hopefully this turn of events will also bring some blood counts back into line. I have some high monocyte numbers, and have had them for six years. It will be neat to see if that is related to a chronic bacterial infection. That is one of the major reasons for high monocyte levels. If they are still high in September at my physical, then I will adress that issue as well as my very low Parathyroid levels. Damn, it is hard trying to get healthy.

Testing 1,2

So yesterday was supposed to be the big day to figure what is wrong with my boo boo belly. I have had some pretty gnarly GI issues for six months now. The theories have ranged from parasite, virus, gluten allergy, stress from divorce, GERD and a few more I probably am forgetting.
Two weeks ago I got the blood test showing I was positive for H Pylori. I also had high Calcium and monocyte levels. MONOCYTES and MONOCYTE COUNT - Elevated levels are seen in tissue breakdown or chronic infections, carcinomas, leukemia (monocytic) or lymphomas. In combo H Pylori & Calcium are sometimes predictors other fun stuff.
So I had the endoscopy & biopsy yesterday, which confirmed two things. I have a small slipped Hiatal hernia. This is not so bad, and does not need surgery. Basically a small part of the stomach slips through the hiatus in the diaphragm. I also have a one cm erosion on my esophagus. This is known as Barrett's esophagus. Barrett's esophagus, untreated, greatly increases the risk of esophagial cancer. So now I am taking Protonix to cut down my stomach acid, and will need to make some lifestyle/dietary changes very soon. Hold on kids, this is where it gets bumpy. The big three are no-no's. Caffeine, chocolate and alcohol. I can hear the collective gasp from everyone, even before they read this.
The gastro also requested a Parathyroid test to see if one of the glands has a tumor. That would explain the elevated Calcium levels, as well as my inability to concentrate, constant tiredness, and some of my depression. Hopefully by next Monday I will have ALL of the information at my disposal and go from there. At this point I am really hoping for the PTH levels to show that one has a tumor (benign) and it can be removed. Then all I need to do is make some changes, albeit quite large for me. We shall see. Time to finish my coffee, no sense in rushing into the changes, and go for a nice long leisurely ride.
Happy Independence Day.

How to squeeze one ton of...

fun, into 48 hours? Attend the VisitPA.com MTB race & festival weekend. There were so many highlights to the weekend that I can not hit them all. Some for me were the following.
Camping out for the first time in fifteen years, night racing for the first time since 1996, comraderie of friends, teammates and competitors, XC course, fifth straight XC win, clinching the MASS series, hanging out with no worries or committments, Frank Brigandi on guitar, Andy & Mike on Mother Goose rhymes, marshmallow guns, that damn billfrog, great breakfast with Ry's Aunt & Uncle, STXC ( I wish I could corner an MTB like the big 'uns), Memphis Blues BBQ in the VIP, zip line, potato gun, punk 'n rip, huffy toss part deux.
What an incredible weekend.
Thanks to Mike, the Oesterlings, the Kuhn's and all my friends who made it so enjoyable.

Whew, at least I am not pregnant

Well the sonogram, yes sonogram, ruled out pregnancy as a stomach issue for me. That sure is reassuring. Step three in the medical process of determining my GI ailment is done. GP, Gastro, Ultrasound, next up is endoscopy & biopsy, followed more than likely by the beloved colonoscopy. I should get all test results after the endoscopy next Tuesday. I just need to wait on more bloodwork and the colonoscopy after that. So hopefully something is nigh.
A funny anecdote came from my endoscopy scheduling. The nurse sadi I could get it done yesterday or today, when I was scheduling two weeks ago. I stammered and replied, "I have a big race that weekend and really do not want to interfere, I know that is stupid." She retorts back in a absolutely beautiful sly sarcastic tone. "No problem, you have put this off for six months already, another week will not hurt." It was priceless.
So I am not feeling well, GI wise, yet again. As John from Cincinati says, "I had a man-size dump today." Sorry for the candor of info, but this was part and parcel of my GI hell. Hopefully all resolves quickly as the coolest MTB race on the planet is this weekend. More to follow. I think I will do another pictorial update of the Farm stage race.

The day in pics

I have been putting in the hours at the shop of late. It is a good thing, that way I can stay occupied. Below is the cast of charecters, minus our boy Reds Snoresney.


The Man, Big Al.

Best buddy & little buddy.

So this is what a pro looks like? Clown on the right.

Now that is pro.

Old school wrench, Jeff.

Guess the shaved/bald guy. I am a "mechanic", not a magician.

Good times. Crazy customers. A guy is pissed that a used wheelset has some minor cracks and has to get it fixed. I end up selling him a new $300 set and he thanks me profusely for making his day. Keep in mind, that as all bike gamers know, $300 retail is pretty freaking cheap. I have two sets that are double that cost, at 20% under wholesale. Lady brings in a bike with the tire mangled and the tube wrapped around the fork. I am snapping pics as Al tells her it will cost $70 to fix all her bike issues. She replies that she paid $70 for the bike at Wal-Mart. Yes, please fix it. WTF!?!?! A guy is in with his son. Son wants to start racing, dad thinks he will be great. I end up showing them all high end carbon. Time, Trek, Lemond, Giant. I bet the kid gets a TCR 1 as his first bike later this week. This will be a $3,000 sale, for a first bike. Holey moly. DAAA was in the shop. He still managed to give Ray shit for not riding a RIGID single blingle at Stoopid 50. Daaa, gears are for queers. Just wait until he sees the new 31'er from Fisher.

For all those who play along in Legendland and patronize/hang out at shops, do yourself a favor and rent High Fidelity. This movie just substitutes a record shop for a bike shop. I made this connection about five years ago with the shop. It totally fits. NYCbikesnob also wrote about this recently.

Off to a work meeting Monday-Wednesday. I am sure I will have some stellar material.

State of disrepair

Man was I wrecked after Neshaminy. No offense to anyone in the 40+ class, but I shut it down with 2 laps to go. Not two 1 mile crit laps, mind you. Two 6 mile 37-40 minute mtb laps. I could tell my body was a hurtin' unit. That race was a new level of suffering, mental & physical for me. Had it not been for Ray's parents who were handing up bottles or Ray/VisitPA.com who paid my entry I may have thought of bagging it.
The course was so sweet, but the 95 temp and three thousand logs turned my lower back into a knotted mess. After years of 75-90 minute crits, a 2:30 mtb race with an avg HR of 173 is a whole new level. So today, Wednesday, I am still tired. I may need to race the road this weekend so I get some efforts, without the beating.
On the GI note my gastro appt went as I expected it. Questions, poking, prodding and schedule an appt for an endoscopy/biopsy. So my Independence day starts a day early with the appt on the 3rd. At least then I will know what, if anything, is amiss in the upper GI. If I "fail" that test then I get the good fortune of the "output" end scope.
On the ink note, I think I am going to make an appt this weekend to run a design idea by an artist. The one I really want may be a little too big to cover/mesh with the present design. I saw another cool Phoenix (mythical bird, as if you did not know) design that would be cool. If you wonder why the Phoenix, do some quick reading as to what the bird is and I think you will agree that it fits pretty well.
Past was good, future is better.

Guess the "healthy" one

I have kept the blog basically "image free" until now. Hopefully I will not digress into some crack whorish fix for pics. Today's image is basically a metaphor for the blog, and me for that matter.

It is guess the "healthy" ankle quiz. Which, like myself, even when "healthy" I am still a little misshapen if you will.

I broke a bone on the side of my ankle & severely sprained it warming up for a race. I then proceeded to the ambulance for some tape and a small Mexican Pharmacia worth of Ibuprofen and proceeded to race. Yeah baby, I still won. Small race, but a win nonetheless. Legendary, is it not? Oh SNAP, I am a doper! Oh no, I suck. Just read the wristband.

I hope the MASS Blue Coats are not piss testing tomorrow.

School was in session tonight

I got to ride with Banana Smallhamfudgepeckerpacker tonight. Man was that fun. We rode at the Oesterling farm. I sat behind Kyle for two hours and learned what it is like to ride fast lines. We were ripping some of the coolest flowing singletrack around. At damn near forty years old and many moons in the amateurish bikegaming biz, I was learning like a 12 year old tonight. When to brake, where to slide, when to flow, when to hammer. Damn good fun. It felt good to be riding right behind someone that good ( do not let it go to your head Kyle, remember job description #5). The hillclimb was only slightly "fun". 900 feet vertical in a little less than 1.5 miles. The decent was nice. 45.4 mph, 41 mph sprint on the flat and that little guy still came around after I thought I dropped him.
A ride or two like that each week and my MTB form will rip around pretty quicklike. Yes, I feel like I am far from form.
On another note, today was yet another bad GI day. Cramping and Ethiopianesque bloating throughout the day. We finished riding and I graced Kyle with a side profile of my 4 months pregnant belly. I gave it the Thimmy Kamala the Ugandan Giant pat down.
I can wait until the gastro says, " I really want to 'scope you." Yes please.
Good times. Oh the road keeps getting harder to go back.

Oh, this is rich

Piepoli's team-mate David Millar has had his share of doping drama. The 30 year-old spent time under suspension after admitting EPO use, and has since become an antidoping advocate. He gave his team-mates the benefit of the doubt, according to AFP. "They are not-negative. Leo has a certificate for asthma. Iban has a testosterone history. It is necessary to give them the benefit of the doubt," Millar declared. "One cannot never be sure with hundred percent certainty, it is always necessary to have doubts. In my personal opinion, they deserve my trust. If I am misled, it would be a pity. That would break our friendship."
You have got to be F'ing kidding me!?!? Millar, yes the same Millar, who so sadly admitted to EPO. Crybaby pussy! That fuck only admitted to EPO once he was caught with the needles in his possession. How many Cofidis riders did little Davey sell out? He even blamed his TWO times usage to the pressures to get results from management. Hmmm, you are hired to do a job. Your employer expects that you do that job. Welcome to life Davey. You damn well know that Davey was going to be hush hush and ride the EPO gravy train right to the World Champion bank. Now that cheesedick has the audacity to say it would be a pity if HE were mislead. WTF Davey!
I hope that scrawny little Piepoli takes Millar behind the woodshed and beats him senseless with the riding crop form Millar's moral high horse.
My advice to riders.
You are paid as cyclists, not speech writers. Keep your day job, and as the great motivational speaker Matt Foley once said, " keep yer damn yap shut!"

Pleased to meet you...

won't you guess my name.
After five long, stinky, painful, gastrointestinal distress filled months I finally went to get a second opinion. Dr's Weaver & Miller had made the diagnosis of Celiac, and it seemed pretty close. Being that I do not want to give up bread, pasta or beer I opted to go with a little more in depth medical expertise.
I got the call from the doctor's office that I needed to call back to speak with the doctor. OK, no problem, something is amiss. At least now I can pin it down. Well I call and am told I am positive for Helicobactor Pylori bacteria. Well at least I have a name for the proverbial face. The shit of it is (no pun intended), that is akin to walking on a Ford dealership lot and the dealer pointing to the lot and saying there is your new Ford. WTF!?!? Which one? What does it do?
I do not even know if it is a live and thriving bacteria, or if it has been in my belly for years. Supposedly H Pylori causes/predicts ulcers. I have no symptoms to suggest that. To make things worse the past two days have been bad GI days for me. Pain, bloating and repeating like a howitzer. I can not believe I am looking forward to having fiber optic tubes inserted and threaded through the old upper and lower openings in the near future.
There are a few other values that are mucked a little high, that may or may not be additive and point to other things. That is for the specialists to figure out. It has been five full months already, another month surely can not make matters worse.
I will say this. I am sick and friggin' tired of being sick and tired.
On another truly depressing note.
It takes, on average, ten years for someone to get correctly diagnosed with Bipolar disorder from disease onset. One in five people with Bipolar disorder will commit suicide. These are the fun things I learn and get to speak about every day.

Persona, Persona non grata

So lately a friend and I have been having this ongoing discussion of image, personality, imposed personality and their interplay. The great, or not so great thing about the Internet is the anonymity that it perpetuates. There is next to no accountability, and anyone can become just about whatever they damn well please. This, all to this pleasure and dismay to anyone who sits in front a screen and perpetuates the debacle.
The intriguing part of daily life is that you only have to try just slightly harder to achieve the same end, and do it right in front of someones face.
So, the discussion had been mostly centered around the fact that very few people really know the real you/me/him/her deep down. What I wear to work perpetuates the myth that I am a true white collar professional. Yet what I wear while practicing for the bike game or working/hanging at the bike game shop, perpetuates the ruse that I am a gamer. The everyday Joe/Jane will have the gilded impression on either side of the dime. At once I am the "man" and an hour later I am a slacker that should get a "real" job. The truth in this great debate lies somewhere in between. Then comes the twist that my friend and I speak about. This is one where you purposely inhabit a personality to go along with what believe perceive, or what you want to convey at that particular time. Sometimes as a joke, sometimes a joke taken to far. If anyone has seen the "podium shoes" you will know what I mean.
So what really is my/your persona? It probably is something, but a handful of people really know, and a busload think they do.
These days I can guarantee you that my real persona is masked well under the podium shoes, Jos. A Banks suits, VisitPA.com bike gaming kit, the tattoos, the house and this silly originallegend diatribe. The few that are "privileged", and or cursed, to really know my persona understand where I come from.
The part of this debate and dilemma is that I/you/we have all done something to inherit the persona non grata we at times try to escape, and we all will still do our damnedest to keep it alive.
Don't mind me. I am going to slip on my podium shoes & VPA.com kit and practice my victory salutes in front of a full length mirror, while sipping a $15 bottle of Delirium Tremens that I poured into my Jeff Gordon #24 pint glass. All this while Hank Williams Jr and Kid Rock blare in the background.
Like I said the truth lies somewhere in between.
Be nice.

Empathy is not always a good thing

I just spent forty minutes writing about my day at work and the impact of mental health disorders. It was far too depressing to publish. I deleted it.

I love you, I hate you!

You define me.
You defy me.
You make me feel good.
You make me hurt.
We have our ups.
We have our downs.
We are one.
We are two.
I am always there for you.
You are always there for me.
I shown you places no one else could.
You have taken me where only you could take me.
I always take care of you.
Yet, you sometimes break down on me.
You have provided some great days.
You have broken my heart before.
I have a heart.
You are heartless.
That is the difference in our relationship.
Without you I am not the same person.
Without me you will find someone else.
I love you!
I love you, my lovely bike(s).

Gotcha!
Yes, this is about my bike(s). After over twenty years the love burns as strong as ever. Something as simple as a bike really can test the limit of human emotion. As shitty as I have felt both physically and mentally the past few months, once I get pedalling it all disappears.
I wonder if i could write off $150/hr for bike relaxation therapy?

Close your eyes and envision

Chris Farley in the tight leisure suit as Matt the self-help guru from Saturday Night Live. He is speaking with Riis, Zabel, the rest of Telekom, all of MG-Geweiss, Musseuw, Hamilton, Basso, Bartoli, Armstrong, Landis, Meirhagge, Chiotti, F'ing tricky dick Virenque, anyone who ever raced for Festina, Rooks, Theunisse, etc... you get the idea.
So, Farley hikes the pants in the front & the back and starts in on them.
Farley: La De Freakin' Da, you all doped. No kidding. No you want to confess, boo frakin' hoo be a man.
Group ensemble: sorry Matt we thought it was time to come clean.
Farley: (Incredulously) Clean, clean, what in the name of God's green earth do you mean clean.
Ensemble yet again: (Sheepishly) Well we, uhh, you know, uhh for the better...
Farley: (Hikes the pants from the front and the back) You are all freakin' girls! You are all freakin' junkie liars. You know where junkie liars end up.
Ensemble: (quizzically puzzled blank stare) Riis, Holm and Aldag meekly reply "Team directors"
Farley: NO!!!! YOU END UP LIVING IN A VAN, UNDER THE BRIDGE, DOWN BY THE RIVER!

Fade out as Farley pratfalls into a row of Cervelo & Giant bikes.

There was never an intention to come clean until the heat turns up. I guess that means Hamilton & Armstrong are truly pathological.

All apologies to the great SNL skit writers.

And this is a surprise how, part deux

http://www.cyclingnews.com/news.php?id=news/2007/may07/may25news

F'ing Riis. We all know you doped. Mr 60%. Yeah, you were clean as a whistle.

And this is a surprise, how?

http://www.cyclingnews.com/news.php?id=news/2007/may07/may24news2

As I have said before, I firmly believe that most of the pro bike gamers were dopers in the 90's. They all answer straightfaced and say they never doped. I call Bullshit, you just never got caught thanks to your own personal centrifuge.
I really could care less. Sports are theatre, entertainment. Entertain me. Part of me is actually of the capitalistic, Darwinism bend of thought that says, let them dope. Ride faster, entertain me more, die quicker. Hell 33% of the pro pel are asthmatics, how convenient. I am surpised that more are not anemic, if you follow along. Maybe some latent childhood ADHD, Narcolepsy or insulin resistance.
Were does this Merry go Round stop? The gamers work in an essential police state environment with a clandestine judicial proceeding. At what point do the innocent have their rights respected.
Riddle me this Batman. Say "The Man" knocks on your HOME door before you go to work and says, "follow me, we are peeing together this morning." Better yet, "wake up sunshine, I am sticking a needle in your arm and sucking some blood." I just want to see what we got going on in your body today. That is every day for some bike gamer.
My overarching points are these:
Mea Culpa my ass. I do not believe for a second you did EPO once. Millar, Zabel, Basso. LIARS!!
10-15 years ago has no bearing on the present.
Police state justice is out of control.
There will always be cheaters. Hell I race against them, even on the local level.
I do applaud Slipstream, CSC and T-Mobile for their stance.
Who knows, this whole thing is just getting old.
Gotta go, my centrifuge just stopped. Time for my daily injection to be ready for Tour de Tykes.
H-crit is up to 57, Riis eat your heart out. I heart dopers!

New ink

I have been tossing some ideas around in my head for some new ink lately. I am not really sure what to get done. I am sure Dr. Weaver will read this and cringe.
So the concept is around new beginnings, living (joie de vie, per se) and cycling. I presently have a upper arm tatt of a nickname for Amy. I do not want to destroy the tatt, but I no longer want it to be focal. It is a Japanese symbol for Pi. Basically a Pi symbol with three bars on the top and two thin bars on the left side. I like the symbol and also the concept of Pi being undefinable and ongoing. My quandry is do I make designs around the symbol or do I incorporate into a cover-up. I was thinking a cover-up with a Phoenix and a flame design. This would also meet my rebirth, rise from the ashes theme.
I am not a fan of bands, so no bike chain band around my 13" pythons. I am not a sleeve person either, but would not be averse to a large total shoulder area fill-in. What to do, what to do.

A funny thing happened on the way to the Coliseum

I have now fully realized how fun racing a MTB is. From the courses that challenge you physically & mentally, to the atmosphere, to the people involved. The mountain scene is like a backyard picnic, while the road scene is like a corporate evening of forced fun. Do not get me wrong, I love racing on the road. The biggest difference is that the competitors are so much more factioned due to team "obligations" or some fantasy about being the next 12k dreamer. It is nice to race your bike and let the strongest fight it out with the course and the competition. There is no sitting in here. The mountain scene also quickly delineates talent. I can race any 1,2 crit in the are and be a factor. If I were to race Elite Mtb I would be fighting for probably 10th-15th on a good day. Talent rises, pretenders fade. Maybe that is why I have so enjoyed cross for all these years. If you put the efforts in, it will show.
So lately I have been on the Flyin' Ryan training plan. Do not exceed 8 hours and then go kick ass. Time to turn the amp to eleven and Spinal Tap out to some big weeks. Oh yeah, I will break the Leech secret. He rocked a 16ish hour week the other week. Look out Hamboner, you and you pre-school possee may be in for some VPA hurtin'.
Enough for this morning. I am finally gettin batteries for my digi so expect some pics the project bike. It was a big hit at Granogue.
Have a good week all.

Who will stop the rain?

Interesting day yesterday. I helped my good friend Nina with her golf tournament fundraiser for the Mark Encin Foundatio. Mark was Nina's husband. He passed about a year and a half ago from malignant melanoma. He was diagnosed in the very late stages and fought like hell, but ultimately succumbed. I really did not know Mark so well, but I always enjoyed my time around him. Nina started a foundation to support melanoma research. The golf tourney is a first step to what I hope is a long endeavor. So many people were so generous that I was truly amazed & humbled. Long story short $12k was raised for two research institutions. For more info on the foundation and Melanoma read here. I had a great time being a very small part of this worthwhile cause.
It is always hard to watch people close to you experience emotions of sadness and grief. Yesterday was no different. The very unfortunate part was that these emotions did not stop at the golf outing. I received a call at 4:00 letting me know that one of my customers who I really enjoy seeing has suffered a tragic and senseless loss. There is no way to even try to quantify the magnitude, except that I feel there is no greater loss a man can experience. At 12:45 pm yesterday a piece of shit with a gun walked into this gentleman's office and shot my customer's wife. Mary died shortly thereafter in the ER. The Moola's have two high school aged children that, when they returned home from school, now have no mother. Jag no longer has his loving wife and friend. I do not understand what can make a person take another's life. Mary was always very nice and pleasant to me. I can only imagine how nice she was for her close friends and family. I can not comprehend eating lunch with your spouse then five minutes later you return to your office to the horror of your spouse being shot.
I will not pontificate about Mental health issues, gun ownership or commensurate criminal punishment.
Dr. Moola, my thoughts are with you and your children today.

Yeah, baby, yeah

I was/am all full of myself with the completion of my new project mtb. An STXC machine. The bike is a one-of-a-kind HEBE brand (note the headbadge). It is the old (10 years) theoriginallegend.blogspot.com model
Yeah baby, the power of the Sharpie.
Here it is
Smorgasbord custom 853 10+ year old steel frame
PACE Carbon rigid fork
Bontrager carbon flat bars & X-lite stem
Schwalbe Fast Fred rubber
Thomsen post
Airione saddle
And the coupe de gras. DURA-ACE 10 speed bar end shifters mounted to a Paul Thumbie
Dura-Ace Read derailleur
Dura-Ace 11-21 cassette
Single 36 tooth front ring w/ custom Hebe design Race Face guard. Trick & tricky
Eponymous & pretentios all at once. That is how I roll. YEAH, BABY YEAH!
I am feeling randy.

Blowin' out the carbon

From my legs, mind, belly, ass
All this achieved in one short visit to Happy Valley. For all yoy JoePa psychos I roade by his home. OOOHHH so mystical. Regular guy, regular house, not a deity.
So I worked with a new rep yesterday in Altoona then bolted off to State College to see my good friend Ry. I always enjoy time around him as he challenges me to think more than I normally do. The conversation is always good and thought provoking. The type that really makes you think about the topic you are forming/supporting an opinion around. Dude can also pedal a bike. I guess being a friggin National Champ tends to make that an understatement. Yesterday was an awesome mix of new and different roads as well as dirt road and SINGLETRACK riding. Yes, full on singletrack on a road bike with 130psi in the tires. Damn it was fun. I had to lay low so as not to destroy his fragile legs. Not really. If you have never ridden singletrack on a road bike, do it. Very fun. It also is imperative to have the proper weight distribution and finesse to make it work. Thanks dude. Good ride.
Zipped downtown for dinner at MadMex. Had the good fortune to be in the throngs of co-eds who were not yet born when I graduated high school. With graduation this weekend at PSU the seniors have nothing to do but party all week. Food was delectable and huge portions. After a little nap it was back the MM for some Tequila. MMMM tequila. A couple of large Margarita's and I was ready to crash.
Then back to the grind of work. I had a great discussion with a doc who is going into a new private practice. Some times it is very rewarding to be a drup rep. That was one of those times.
More to come soon

The best/worst kept secret

The times, they have a changed. Being that about a whole dozen or so people know this drivel actually exists, I guess I am writing more for myself.
After twelve very good years of marriage things started to spiral last March. The reasons are not of any great consequence, and since this is a bully pulpit medium it is not fair to Amy to go into them where she can not fairly reply. Then in September the bottom basically fell out. By November Amy and I decided to seperate and ultimately divorce. Our divorce will be final in about two months, I believe. Throughout the past six months of living on my own I have experienced a vast realm of emotions. I have has the good fortune of a lot of very great friends, you know who you are, lend me support. Without them and my family I would not be where I am at presently. To list all of the people who have been so kind, giving, understanding with me would be a disservice because I know I would leave someone out. I want to take another time to say thank you.
So, here I am now. I have made it out alive (figure of speech, not literal) and I will be a better and wiser person. I am sure that, ultimately, Amy will be a better and wiser person as well. So there, I have said it publicly. I have accepted my lot in life and what brought me to where I am. Now it is time to start another chapter of this great adventure. I hope that with the support, love, laughter of my great friends and family I will go on to have forty more years to pester all of you with my inane nonsense.
I am not about to dispense wisdom, learnings or advice. Obviously all three of those little nuggets should be taken with a grain of salt.
Tomorrow I will get up, go to work, ride my bike, enjoy my friends and live my life to the fullest that I can. I will do the same the next day and the next and hopefully for many thousands thereafter.
Funny thing happening as I close. Those who know me know my love of music. Those who know me well, know how I internalize and relate to lyrics. As I close this entry, The Verve tune "Lucky Man" just came on Itunes shuffle. Yes, I am a very lucky man for all that I have experienced, and all that I will experience. It may not seem like it at times, but yeah Sister Luck has definitely called out my name more times than not.

Random race thoughts

I still love racing my bike.
I love the scene, the people, the personal challenge.
I do not enjoy when that is spoiled in some respect.
Branchbrook was the first time I was actually freaked out while racing.
If you use the porta-pots, slide the freaking handle shut.
Nice touch at LP to place Human Zoom reading literature in the porta's for us. Sunday Philly paper would have been cool also.
Smoother course mean more bozos are there at the end.
Some people still think sprinting for 50th is cool.
Crit racing is NASCAR, think about it. It really is.
Bike racing distorts ones reality.
Wheelsets are now more expensive than bikes, when I started racing.
Everyone has a pair of those wheels, if not two pair.
Teammates make or break the racing experience.
EVERYONE, keep your day jobs.
Stay safe, stay fun, enjoy the ride.
Twain was once quoted as saying, "there is nothing so pure as a boy and his bicycle."
I would hate to have that spoiled.

I heart TV

Yes, there, I said it. I LOVE TELEVISION! If you so decide there are no shortages for entertainment. Especially when it is viewed on a 60" HD set. I have become smitten with MHD. It is a music station , that get this, actually plays music. I just watched the Isle of Wight festival with the Who & Bowie. Amazing music, amazing pic. Except that you can see how craggly Daltry & Bowie are up close.
Seriously, I never understood the "kill your television" crowd. TV is entertainment, nothing more, nothing less. If your stance is on the dumbing down of America, should you not kill your laptop, or kill your local theatre troupe? They are forms of entertainment. After a day of work or a ride, I want to be entertained. I want to experience something that I can not experience without this medium. I will never work an Alaskan crab boat, I will never go to Scotland for a concert, I will never build a motorcycle, I can not easily get to NYC to see aplay. I can do all these things from the comfort of my couch for less then the cost of a venti mocha-nilla frappa-chi half-fat all pretense no whip triple lindy americano machiatto.
To my TV hating peeps out there, you have missed the boat. Kick back relax and be entertained. Do not look at your set for education, although you easily can. Look at your set for sheer entertainment. Sit back watch a show and smile, you will be better off for loving your telly. Really, it is OK. Now, go hug your telly, especially since Sanjaya is leaving Idol.

525 thousand 600 minutes

How do you account for a year?
Watching RENT right now and forgot how much I enjoy that musical. Eric, Amy & I took my mom to see RENT in Philly for Mothers' Day years ago. Great show, good times.
Seriously, as the song goes, how do you account for a year?

- Seasons of Love Lyrics
Five hundred twenty-five thousandSix hundred minutes,
Five hundred twenty-five thousandMoments so dear.
Five hundred twenty-five thousandSix hundred minutes
How do you measure, measure a year?
In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights
In cups of coffee In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife
In five hundred twenty-five thousand Six hundred minutes
How do you measure A year in the life?
How about love?How about love?How about love?
Measure in love Seasons of love. Seasons of love
Five hundred twenty-five thousandSix hundred minutes!
Five hundred twenty-five thousandJourneys to plan.
Five hundred twenty-five thousandSix hundred minutes
How do you measure the life
Of a woman or a man
In truths that she learned,Or in times that he cried.
In bridges he burned,Or the way that she died.
It's time now to sing out,Tho' the story never ends
Let's celebrate Remember a year in the life of friends
Remember the love!Remember the love!Seasons of love!
Oh you got to got to Remember the love! remember the love,
You Measure in love know that love is a gift from up above
Seasons of love. Share love, give love spread love
Measure measure your life in love.

After 525 thousand 600 of the most trying minutes of my life, I segue to Finale B

There is no future
There is no past
Thank God this Moment's not the last
There's only us There's only this
Forget regret or Life is yours to miss
No other road no other way
No day but today
I can't control My destiny
I trust my soul
My only goal
Will I lose my dignity
Will someone care
Will I wake tomorrow
From this nightmare
Just to be
Without You
The hand gropes, The ear hears
The pulse beats, Life goes on
But I'm gone
There's only now
There's only here
Give in to love Or live in fear
No other path No other way
Cause I die Without you
I die without you
I die without you
I die without you
I die without you
I die without you
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
NO DAY BUT TODAY!!

Lyrics courtesy of original RENT score.
Sentiments courtesy of my cluttered mind.

I will start over again tommorow and look forward to the next 525 thousand 600 minutes where I will live and I will love. That is the measure of this man

Dinner

Sweet Potato souflee
Toasted whole wheat bagel w/ grilled chicken and cheese
Granny Smith apple w/ Crazy Richard's organic extrra crunchy peanut butter
Penn Brewery Pilsner

Uninspired

Yes I am. Tons of shit going on lately. I just do not feel compelled to share. Some stuff is much more personal than others. In due time I will spill the beans. Time to go house hunting.
It is amazing how thin veils are these days, is it not?

Hooda thunk it

I have an itch that needs a scratchin' Not the one in my middle back which is dry like the Sahara & real itchy. Double time with the shower brush. Oops, back to point.
In a slightly hypo manic phase this week I deemed it necessary to race my mtb a few times this year. Yes, I said mtb. I actually raced mtb for 4-5 years in the early 90's. In fact I will be racing the steed from that long gone era. A custom geo SMORGASBORD 853 steel is friggin' real ride. From what I remember the SMOR is from '97. Ten years young and still sub 23 lbs.
So I got her ride, not race, ready the past few days. With the addition of a new Manitou R7 fork and some Easton bar/stem swag ( thank god Bell sports is distributing Easton now) on the way I will be set. I replaced my indexed headset with a sweet green King fron Benny today. It looks sweet with the faded green decals and orange frame.
So tomorrow I ride with the royalty of Central PA mtb. Weston V the 14th, Manzarek & Nance. Michaux for 3-4 hours. I hope the fork holds out.
More to report Sunday.

Walk a mile...

... in my shoes at the present time. Go ahead I dare you.
It has been one body blow after the next.

Sing to the cadence of Sorry Somehow, Husker Du.

Friends and fam don't know what to say, hold you with kid gloves
Yeah I know words are tough, just send a little love
Nights are short and days are way too long, just like to rub it in
It's not a game this is my life, when will I ever win
Climb the rung start to see the light I can almost see the top
Two steps up and three more back when will I get the drop
Walk a mile if you will, do you have the time
Buckle up and hold on tight everything will be just fine
Here we go yet again it's getting fucking old
Your grass is green and it will grow, it's not made of gold
Bleed me dry, hope you feel good, get your pound of flesh
Play by the rules don't be so sneaky, that would be the best
Cut off your nose to spite your face, forest through the trees
Pick you battles wise my friend, do you want to mess with these
Walk a mile if you will, do you have the time
Buckle up and hold on tight everything will be just fine
What do you want to be when you grow up, hurry now and decide
Do you bleed red for the colonel, no, that's corporate suicide
Give me your best, we'll take care of you, yeah we'll give you our all
Sit by your phone yet again, here comes that November call
Ten years in, fifteen to go, a lifetime away
I can barely get outta bed and make it through the day
Walk a mile if you will, do you have the time
Buckle up and hold on tight everything will be just fine
Touch 'em all rounding third save the best for last
We had fourteen years, I hoped for more, yeah they were a blast
No one knows, no one ever can or will, like the way I do
We shared the best and we shared the worst, table set for two
Now here it is the time is coming I worry what they'll say
I know in my heart I tried my best to love you every day
Walk a mile if you will, do you have the time
Buckle up and hold on tight everything will be just fine

God love the Ruskies

Sorry Lux. I think I just spent $8.00 at my new fave download site. www.allofmp3.com that $8.00 got me 52 songs. Sweet!
Bedtime.

Shake dem bones

Yeah, it has been a while since I busted out some Dead. Tonight just felt right. Some good Tequila is working so I will try to recollect some of my fondest memories of some of my best times with the most important people of my life.

I was a late bloomer. 86ish when I started getting hooked a year or two late seeing shows, Thanks go out to the infamous Webb brothers. Good dudes. Big Al Webb especially. I remember being at an RFk show with my bro, Silsley & my Mom. I saw Big Al strolling thorugh the crowd. i have not seen him for a year or so as he went out West to sky. There he was. Minutes later I saw my man Fabo ("I love pot"). The big guy almost crushed me with a hug. That is what the Dead was about.
RFK:
Oysters with SWaulters & Amy. Bojangle chicken & bisquits. Yummy
Camel hair van and the keg/broken door incident
Camel hair van and the beer ball drive
Me almost getting arrested protecting the said Camel hair van
Eric, Steve, Carolyn & I in the very fucking top row at RFK. Row Jimmy comes on. Totally awesome. We decide it is time to go to the floor to move. Sils jumps the fence and the guards chase him whilst Eric, Carolyn & I stroll in.
Selling Barleywine homebrew
Fred Clepper, god rest his soul.
Steve's car alarm
Broken foot and crutches in 95 degree heat. Foot swelled like a bloated sausage
DK
Tading birks for tix. I am wearing the Birks right now. 15 years later.
Amy, no show was complete without lovely Ames being indoctrinated.
Digress, Brokedown Palace is on now. Full on tears, sorry. My cousins played this at their Mom's funeral a few years back. God rest, Janet. Eric & I got them into the Dead.
First time, and only time I wor a skirt/dress. Regimental, fuck yeah it was comfy. I danced liked a true Deadhead that night
Baked, lots
Drunk, lots
Drum circle under the overpass
$1 beers and Falafels
Crazy buses
Crazier people
Lisa Heintzleman where are you? Man I would like to see you again
Star Lake:
Mike Hart, Shecky, Fabo, Ames
'Shroomin & boomin
Meadowlands:
Keystone Light, 3 for $2 just to get home. Yeah I was broke
Steve Miller band & Sting as openers. Sweet
Nasty paved parking lot scene, the worst
Notar, my brother. Mother fuck, you were right! I miss you man.
Cap Centre;
Jen Maclay, virtue & vice
Some vegan girl from Madre who wanted to ride along
SECOND FUCKING ROW. Bobby spit on me, almost
Who has my miracle. Why I do, young man. Two seats second row center for $100 total
What a trip literal, figurative
The best lot food
March early 90's shows 4 nights. I commuted every one.
I tought severe MR & disabled kids how to swim in the morning. They made the trip worthwhile.
Scraping the concrete median on the drive home night three.
Got wasted and said something dumb to Jen Maclay. I will always be sorry for that.
First shows with Gus.
Boulder Theatre:
Little women
The night Brent Midland died, freaky.
Turns out a did a lot of mtb'ing with the Little Women drummer years later in PA
Superweek:
Won tix to see Bobby at Alpine Mt. Front row. Bike race, guess which won out. Dumb.
There was much, much more. This was just a little taste

SSSHHHH, I have/had a secret

I do. Some know, most do not. It is cathartic to talk about it, yet painful enough I want to conceal it.
I had heard about the Post Secret project from a TV special. Basically, a man from MD placed postcards everywhere he could think & asked people to return them to him with a secret. There were two conditions. The secret must be true. No one has ever heard the secret before.
I figured I would buy the book and try to use it as a way to help me in some fashion. I made it to page twenty-four before the tears were streaming down my cheeks. I have two hundred and fifty-one pages of someones most private thoughts to read. This may very well be the most powerful collection ever compiled.
Post Secret, compiled by Frank Warren

Numerology Top 20

1 Number of cars I punched today
2 Number of times I called the lady a "Fat, See you next Tuesday!"
3 Pieces of Muenster cheese on my sammy I had for lunch. Yummy
4 The number of Black Crowes discs in my CD player. Listening to a lot a Crowes lately
5 The number of cars that almost hit me today. I mean within 2-3 bike lengths close calls
6 Days until Nats race
7 Days until a wicked drunken bender
8 Snowman, in golf parlance, I hope Amy gets a White Christmas
9 Thousand miles I will have ridden my bikes this season
10 Cans of Diet Vanilla Pepsi in my fridge
11 Days until D-day
12 Years, Amy & I have been married
13 Unlucky, I will skip Thirteen
14 Cross top tens this season. Including two series overalls
15 More shopping days until Christmas
16 Cross races this year. After a 40 race road season
17 Weight, in pounds, of my Cross race bike
18 Age of Consent, New Order song just popped in my head
19 th Nervous Breakdown. Stones. Fitting
20 Days off I have after next Tuesday until I go back to work

Blogference Call

Since I did some Net surfing during my year-end eval Monday, today I will keep up the trend. I will compose this blog while on a conference call for work. Some may call it apathy. I prefer to look at it as a way to ultra focus my concentration. To be the consummate multi-tasker. To be able to engage both all of the brain at once, creative, logical and executive function.
Here we go. Sweet, I think my manager has given us the incorrect access code. I am on a call that is for managers. WTF! Damn, I just missed some area awards. That would have been classic to here that info.
Yesterday I had a great ride on the road bike. Nice tempo with some Threshold (400+) Watts thrown in. Legs are really good going into Nats. I may race on Sunday or zip to Lancaster for the Sunday Worlds. I want one last good hard effort then BIG rest. Front row start, so hopefully I will make the best of it. Get out fast and roll strong.
I went to Eric's last night to pick up a piece of furniture. It just fit in the Blazer. DK is helping me move it in today. I had a nice talk with my bro last night. He helped me think through some things and it was good to be able to talk through all the stress that I am experiencing. We talked about my career and how unfufilling it is presently.So much goes through my mind every day. What to do? Should I make some serious changes in my life? Will some serious changes in my life be made for me?
Back to my call. Blah, blah, blah. Yeah I got it.
Here we go, let's be creative. Any visuals? ASS CLOWN! Can we use a Lionel train? You know, open the gate to Gateway. HA HA HA HA. Unfreakin' real. Yeah I have been selling for 9+ years in this industry, and the best support I can get in a f'in Lionel train! That screech you just heard wasmy career hit the Lionel train breaks. Choo, Choo, chugga, chugga, chugga. I think I can, I think I can.
Call is done. I am out.

So much to say

So hard to say it. For the seven or eight people who read this you will have to wait another week. I jokingly say on my profile something to the effect of "those in the know, know". Well that is quite true the past few months.
I have never cared less about work. I had my year-end performance review today at Starbucks. I was connected to the interent to access some Lilly info for my review. After a few minutes, I actually started surfing Cyclingnews, velonews, bikereg and a few blogs, during the review. My manager did not have a clue and I was two feet away from him. Unreal. The highlight of the eval was my monstrous rice krispy treat & soy mocha.
Riding is going well. The legs are really responding with a good ride at States & great ride at Reston. They were fun days on a bike. Yesterday, I was very aware of what was going on. People taking pics, what announcers are saying, who is cheering, people watching. It was somewhat surreal. The race was hard, but I was so in tune with everything. That is, until that last greasy little root that I bobbled and lost contact w/ Joe & Gunnar my Gunnar. At least I concentrated on something positive for a while.
Personally, today I woke up and said "today is a new day". Tomorrow I will do the same. At least I had the company of a good friend to hang with this weekend. That makes life more bearable.
To all my cross friends and aquaintences, it was a great season. Thanks for racing and making weekends fun.

Perspective

As I was sitting in an office, feeling sorry for myself the other day, I gained a little perspective. Today it hit home. No matter what happens in my life work, personal, social, cycling, regardless. I have my health.
I was waiting for my lunch appointment, and out of the office came a gentleman that put me in my place. Working in the mental health/neurology field, you tend to see some people who are going to elicit an emotional response. I try not to make eye contact with patients, so I do not have a response to them that they get a hundred times a day. The young man, maybe early 30's, came out of the office shuffling behind a walker. He could barely move. His sister, as best as I could tell, was trying to get his coat on him. There was a little girl who was with them and she wanted some candy. The sister, said she already ate on of her three pieces and this would be her next to last piece. The sister then asked the young man if he knew how many pieces of candy the little girl would have left. He took a little while and then thought aloud in a barely audible and recognizable voice said, "two". The sister then reminded him that this is the second piece of candy. "Three minus two, is how many?" After about five seconds, he replied, "one."
This gentleman was not MR, he has just been ravaged by a disease that has taken his body & his mind.
So when we are pissed about finishing 12th instead of 8th, or even worse, 2nd instead of 1st. Maybe it is time to get a little bit of perspective.

Kind of like watching a car wreck

For Ms Dambach, Its a long way to the top

I had a project in 8th grade music to write a story using song titles. Here is a borderline manic attempt twenty-five years later. A true manic would not stop at the R's, but I need to sleep.
Try to guess how many titles you can find.
Rock & Roll ain't noise pollution, especially when it gets the girls dancin. Amy likes to dance. She's crafty as she works the homies for a little brass monkey for her and her circle of friends. You know I will always be by your side. Hell, only a fool would let you go. I need a remedy for that thorn in my pride. You should never have to say quit kickin' my heart around. The bike, sometimes salvation, sometimes it will just sting me.
Is it too late to change now? What's my age again? Dammit, maybe I should act it before I go man overboard and they rename Adam's song. I will be Johnny 99 before you know it. Going all apeshit in the badlands in the darkness at the edge of town, down by the cadillac ranch. Because the night was so bad I did not know what else to do. For what it's worth, I did not mean to hurt anyone. Do not worry about me, I will survive. A sugarhigh here or there will probably get me in a whole lotta trouble. It's these pictures of you that I look at everyday that drive me crazy. I would do anything to be one of your heros again. This years love has been hard. I feel the pain.
Did you ever just want to lose yourself? You know, shake that up a little. I do not mean hey man, nice shot style. All my life I have tried to avoid times like these. I have tried to do everything in you honor. Now it seems I have thrown a monkeywrench in my own happiness. It looks like it may be time to learn to fly. Some may say that nice guys finish last, but I am in the minority and disagree. Bittersweet my ass, just bitter, nothing sweet about it. Never did I say I don't want to know if you are lonely. Now I am just sorry somehow and hardly getting over it, because really all this I've done for you. No promise have I made means more than the my vow to you. I would run to the hills to keep that. Jane says that she thought we would be the couple slow dancing in a burning room, just waiting for the world to change. Now I just hurt, like I have the folsom prison blues. Jackson, the cocaine blues have nothing on these. I feel like I have been everywhere, yet stuck in a ring of fire that I can not get out of. Like a 1960's black chick white guy scene, in good ole sweet home Alabama. Am I just wasting time, walking down this lonely road of faith like some cowboy pretending to be all Mr Brightside? All these things that I've done I can never bring back. I can not rock and roll all nite, but I can shout it out loud like some Christine sixteen on prom night. I love you!
Ready, steady, go. It is time I remove that proverbial long black veil and kickstart my heart. Who knows, after the goldrush I may not feel so helpless? Never so bad to see the needle and the damge done, yet at times I really do wanna be sedated. Just get on that crazy train and steal away the night like someone freakshow diary of a madman. Just ride on until you say, let my love open the door because you know I do not need somebody to love. I just need you to love.
Yes I have been under pressure lately. Mama we are all crazy now, especially me. Talk about the passion, I know the bike is to blame. I probably would have taken to gardening at night so I could keep training. It seems like the end of the world as we know it, or at least as I know it. People going here, there and everywhere, but don't go back to rockville. Driver 8 is full steam ahead even though you can't get there from here. It looks like there is a bad moon rising tonight, this is the Rancid version though. I just hope I do not fall back down as the first time hurt enough.
There you go. I opened my soul and my Ipod. The titles are in alphabetical order by artist, which made it tricky, from AC-DC to Rancid.
I apologize to all my family and friends who I have placed second to my own desires for so long. You all have deserved better.
Sincerely,
Mike

Feel the pain

Cross has been good so far. I have been feeling the "A" pain, and gaining a lot of confidence. Decent legs, little race stress, good mindest. Enough said.
Unfortunately I have been starting my days out with Dinosaur Jr., Feel the pain, of late. Great song, yet it is one that I tend to internalize more than most. I attach meaning and memory to music. There are certain signs that I watch out for. Feel the pain is the harbinger, not forwarding through Husker Du , Candy Apple Grey album is the other.
Gotta go, Bob Mould is calling.

And a good time was had by all

Ames & I went to a nice quaint gathering @ Scott & Earl's house last night. Scott has a great place on second street. 1800's house w/ exposed brick walls walnut wainscoting for the ceilings and textured paints & papers. Really sweet place. Thanks for opening your house and making some great food. Danny & Libby were there as were Steve & Steph. Danny & Steve are two of the funniest guys I have ever met. I need to tie on a Hubert J Ass buzz with those guys some night. Good food, drink, friends and fun. I'll take that anyday.
Today was the first cross event of the season & Kris, Bernie & the C3 crew kicked ass. Great show everyone. It was hot today, and I do not do well in hot cross races. I decided it was bottle & cage day, wise choice. I drank a full bottle during the race. Forty guys started the Elite race. After some sorting out I settled in with a group from 6-12. I did most of thje work chasing my old FORT mates, and ended up 10th. I am happy with that. My poor MidAtlanticcross.com sticker bike was squealing like Ned Beatty in Deliverance. Avid front brakes stink, too grabby and always squeal. I saw a lot of my cross friends again, that was good for the mind.
The vibe was great. I heard a lot of people cheering for me, so that felt good. That is what is so cool with cross., everyone supports everyone else. Cross really is king.
Oh yeah. Leech kicked ass. HOWEVER, HE ROLLED A FREAKIN' TUBIE. Five minutes into the season & HE ROLLED A FREAKIN' TUBIE.

Do you ever ride to just enjoy it?

Those were the prophetic words once uttered by my mother. I had to really think about it when she said that. I have been racing since '87. At first it started in Triathlons, almost as a challenge from my old high school principal, who raced triathlons. For me it was all about being better than that hard-ass. Racing was an experiment in '87, a progression in '88 a full throttle lifestyle choice by '89. In '90 I moved to Boulder to train for Ironman. What an experience, what a beautiful area. Back to PA to race the road for a few years. Then the switch to Mtb's for a few years. That was fun. People were fun, riding was fun. I took it all for granted. Then my buddy Rod Myers got me back to the road scene in 2000. Man that was hard to get rolling again. Since then I have worked very hard to be the best racer & teammate that I can possibly be. Along the way I forgot that the lowest common denominator of racing harkens all the way back to Mark Twain. Twain once said, paraphrased, "there is nothing so pure as a boy and his bicycle."
Last night I set out to pay hommage to Mr Twain. I took my cross steed to Pinchot Park to ride the horse, hiker, bike trails. Most are banned to bikes (shhh), most are very underused. A great mix of roots, some rocks, but mostly twisty turny single-track that makes you want to smile and make motorcycle cycle throttle sounds. It was so much fun to rip around back there. I actually found a great section of Lakeside trail that is marked for bikes. This may be my new weekly gig.
Last night I enjoyed being on a bike more than ever. Nothing could spoil the mood, not flat #1, 10 minutes in, or flat #2 20 minutes later. It was so much fun. No stress about work, racing or Ames being away. It was just a boy and his bicycle, simple & pure.

In the blink of an eye

A man's life was taken from him last night.
http://spokepost.com/news/story/1535/?PHPSESSID=c282b42b53e9e5531a6736010b6c3601

How many cars pass you when you are out on a ride? How many times is that taken for granted? I know I never give it a second thought. Jon Dechau probably never did either. I met Jon once or twice, and do not profess to know him. I friend of mine knows Jon very well, and I am sure he is pretty upset as I write this. I could drone on and on about cars and drivers who do not pay attention. Riding a bike on a public road is an inherent risk, just not one that I see as a bad risk. Every day it seems to get a little worse. It is getting to be like a Hill Street Blues send-off, "Let's be careful out there."
Enjoy what you do, do what you enjoy. Just be careful out there.

Been a while

A little chronology.
8/25 Who knows, who cares
8/26 Ames & I went to Cape May for a few days
8/27 Beautiful day at the beach
8/28 See above
8/29 AC for some Pai Gow. Flummoxed at first then the flow came back.
8/30 Came home as it was to be a rainout due to Ernsto & we needed to get stuff done at home
8/31 Mowed the yard. First time since July 4th weekend
9/1 see 8/25. Started to rain
9/2 Rain and more rain
9/3 B-day brunch at Mom's w/ Eric & Julie. The to the Kessels for more b-day food & fun
9/4 39 baby
9/5 Work again, blah. Possible good news on the career front
9/6 see 9/5
9/7 Very good lunch with manager looking to hire for the job that I want
9/8 see 9/5 & 6. Notice how rewarding my present job is
9/9 TT. 30 seconds off what I should have ridden. Beat person I needed to beat. Did cross clinic, that was very fun. YBR group is great and very thoughtful.
9/10 Decent ride today w/ DK. Middle hour was low-end tempo. Did not eat at all during ride and small breakfast haunted me. KABLOOIE, ZING, POW, BANG, CRASH. Yes I bonked as in 8 mph on a 14 mph climb. Just dying and shaking. Sucked down a Pepsi & hit Newberry diner with Ames. Slept on couch for two hours.
All caught up. Three weeks in 10 minutes. How uneventful.

Integrity for sale, 40% off

So, I decide I need some new shorts for the beach this weekend. I have not purchased any new shorts lately, so it was high time. I decided the Bon Ton would be my best bet to get some nice casual shorts for a good deal. I get to the shorts section and find a few pair that are my size and are pretty nice. Since I have this hang-up on spending any money on myself, I guess it is common among my "people", I am hoiping the sale price of $40/pair is discounted. I look around to see if there is any sign, anf lo and behold I see a 40% off sign above the Nautica SHIRTS. Well maybe this applies that is a bonus. I go to checkout and a very nice lady helps me out. I am trying to see the screen as she rings my shorts up, and viola 40% off. Sweet. Pair number two gets their attention and whoaaaa nelly. What gives, something is amiss. The formerly nice lady is now questioning me. Sir, this pair comes up as 80% off. Is there an 80% off sign at this rack? Uhhh what to do. " I am not sure?" "I just pulled all the shorts off the same Nautica rack, so I assumed they would be the same price." This is strange she says two pair are 40% off, and this pair is 80% off. They are all the same brand. At this point, I know damn well what the sign said, I also know damn well I was quick on my feet with the "all the same brand, I just figured blah blah blah BS." We have come to a retail impasse. She then gives me this look like, I am going to hook you up. The friendly check-out lady then says, "how about I just ring all of these shorts up at 80% off." What am I to say? No really, I appreciate the hospitality, but I would prefer to pay the extra $30. No, I did what any good retail shopper did. I marked down my integrity by an additional 40%.
Thank you Bon Ton.

Legendisms

So I have generally been feeling pretty bummed lately, for a myriad of reasons.
I reached for, Suess-isms: Wise & Witty prescriptions for living from the good doctor.
Being that I am finding less enjoyment in most things of late I decided to see if I could bastardize the good doctor.
Here goes.
Actually I just erased my bastardizations. I think I had an epiphany will reading a children's book.

You have brains in your head
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose
You're on your own
And you know what you know
And YOU are the guy
who'll decide where to go
-Oh the places you'll go

Come on! Open your mouth and sound off to the sky!
Shout loud at the top of your voice,
"I AM I!"
ME! I am I!
And I may not know why
but I know that I like it.
Three cheers! I AM I!
-Happy Birthday to you!

Only you can make your mind up!
You're the one and only one!
-Hunches in Bunches

Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot,
nothing is going to get better.
It's not.
-The Lorax

I meant what I said
I said what I meant
The LEGEND is faithful
One Hundred percent
-Legend hatches the egg

There you have it. Children's book quotes. Pathetic

Better reading:
www.flicklives.blogspot.com piss your pants funny
www.blacklane.blogspot.com no holds barred, NC-17 rated
www.antibike.blogspot.com you mean you can ride a bike and not race it? Who knew?
www.jackiebrowne.blogspot.com LOML

Fun in the sun

New race yesterday. Awesome course for a first year race. Yellow line rule shmellow line rule. Yeah, that lasted about 10 minutes. Rippin fast, but easy to sit in. Hacker was an attacking stud yesterday. Went twice, once for about 1 1/2 laps solo. I sat second third wheel and watched him ride. It was impressive. Tried to go once but the filed kept coming then Trey would not work, so that was failed. Two mile to go and I positioned Jared at the front. Swarm hits and Kyle Eckley helps us out before Nate takes over. We were just too far away. Young TSV guys & Ideal Tile guys get jumpy and all hell breaks loose on the little climb. I am positioned well in 6th, then Mike Miller decides today is his day to learn how to sprint & chops the corner, gapping both of us. Fight to get back in line & end up eighth. Jared meanwhile ramps it from a LOOOONG way out and hold for third. I end up ninth. Miller 16th. At least that is what i think the blurry ffinish photo said.
Then off to our very hospitable afternoon hosts Rob & Caroline Hacker for some awesome beer, food & swimming. What a fun afternoon. There was more dry cutting humor in one gathering than at Last Comic Standing audition. Rob crushed the grill with the some aplomb as his race attacks. It was classic when Caroline's mom was busting Rob. "Isn't my son-in-law just the smartest son-in-law." I wish I could remember whar precipitated that exchange, it was priceless. I think Hacker slipped me a BOCA burger instead of a real flesh burger though. My GI was all rumbly for the way home. Rob & Caroline, thanks again for the great afternoon.

Vacation

It is on the horizon. 8/27 for a week, then long weekend for Labor Day. The the last of the 30's b-day fete. Well maybe not a fete. Crabs & croquet anyone? Hopefully DK will not sulk this year when he loses again.
Road season is winding down. It has been long and quite successful for myself and the team. Hopefully we can keep it up for another month. Cross is two months away and I am starting to get a little itch. Maybe I will take a week or so off the bike and come into cross really wanting to rip. Last year I was dead. Physically & mentally, I was done at Granogue weekend. Hopefully the more miles and less intensity training I have done this year will be the trick. I have as many miles in now as I did on October 9th of last year. I have not followed a training plan this year, so mentally I am pretty fresh to ride.

Catching up & dumb, dumb, dumb

A lot of stuff has transpired in three weeks, yet I felt no real motivation to write about it.
New job possibilities still on hold, although the position is now definitely open and should move forward quickly.
A few races where my tactical errors cost me. Hummelstown, Allentown and Crit Nats.
Nats RR in rain and with food poisoning/virus. Yeah, that was fun.
Work is still boring as sin.
Trying to figure out cross season, on all fronts that I am involved with.
Trying to get through road season without cooking myself.
Trying to spend time with Ames whenever possible.
A good friend's husband passed away after a lengthy bout with cancer, he was only 36.
Neighbors have been away all month, definitely a hole in the 'hood.
Reeser's soft Ice cream has been phenomenal.
Tour has been phenomenal.
Landis is inspirational. How long before fatass Lemond downplays Floyd's ride?
Oh Yeah, the title, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Mt Holly RR. 92 miles of flat, fast Navigators led Jersey racing with 150 guys who all think they should be at the front. Being that it is Mt Holly, two things are guaranteed, rain & a big crash. Well right after the start the heavens opened with a monsoon, and no that is not an overstatement. The wind was so strong for a while that the rain flat-out hurt when it hit you. I enjoy racing in the rain, it seems to calm me down and make my legs feel good. Right from the start I stay towards the front, just in case. Fred Billet moves me from 40th to top 10 when the first swarm starts. From there it is rippin fast through a little woods section and into town through the chicanes. Then to the feed and a false downhill with a tailwind and 38 mph. After this section we turn 180 into a false up headwind and those who were not in front come rippin into the front. Dumb, dumb, dumb. As I was sitting 15-20 deep I see some movement out of my periphery, to the right. All of a sudden two guys fall to either side at 30+ mph. I get by to the left, but then it happens. The sound no racer wants to hear. Bikes smashing into each other, aluminum breaking and piling up, tubulars exploding. It must have went on for 5-10 seconds as we were riding away. There it is. Mt Holly is decided 15 miles in due to a crash that takes out SEVENTY riders! All of my teammates are involved. Flyin' Ryan went over the bars and over a ditch. He said after he landed and got up people were still flying into the crash at 30 mph, oblivious to the carnage. To add insult to Mg-GPOA injury I flat 20 miles later and negotiate the painted line & cobblestone chiacanes on a flat front tire. I go from 10th all the way to the back waiting for Mavic to come with a wheel. When they finally arrive, behind six other team cars the field is 300 meters up the road. I ask for a draft to the caravan and the tech does not respond. Tehn as I give chase here comes Mavic flying by, zoom no pace. I go through the feed zone and hear that I am twenty seconds back. Not bad if there is a climb. twenty seconds solo, when the field is going 38 chasing a break means I need to go 40 for about a mile. Yeah right. I chase 3 miles and the field is gone and my team car is nowhere to be seen, as they were caught up and trying to get Ryan back in the race. At least I stayed upright. Ryan has been going so well & I felt good, I wish we could have had the chance to race.
Oh yeah, when I got my wheel change at the finish of lap three. Here is what my computer read.
36 miles in 1:14, 29 mph, and it really was not hard at all.

Long day in the saddle

Not really.
It was a long day on the couch though. Shitty weather and some decent sports, World Cup, F1 & NASCAR, at least for me. It started with the England vs. Portugal game. I missed maybe the first fifteen minutes after getting back form a nice easy ride. However, from 11:30 on I was on fire logging almost eight hours of big couch time. After a little nap during the F1 race, I got nutty and switched couches and positions. I went from the couch to the loveseat, and seated to reclined. Yep, that was the big news of my day. Back to the couch for NASCAR.
The England match was pretty good. I do get sick of all the fake flopping those guys do, yet it was still a good match.
F1 was the typical race to turn one and that is all she wrote. Schumi did drive a nice race, but positioning is everything.
NASCAR was a road course, so it was one of the two days where they actually have to show skill. No real surprise in who dominated. Gordon was spot on. Reminded me of the SPEED Network special where he drove Juan Pablo Montoya's F1 ride at Indy. He rocked out at .5 seconds slower than JPM, after about an hour in the car. Say what you will, the dude can drive.
All in all it was pretty f'in boring today. The only real highlights were a killer brunch & dinner that Ames made.

Damn Birds

If the freakin' birds outside the bedroom keep me awake again tonight I am getting a pellet gun/pistol tomorrow. I crash in the spare bedroom if I can not sleep. Outside the window is a tree which is home to these evil nocturnal birds. They woke me at 1:30 this morning, so I went outside to show them who is boss. I picked up a handful of mulch and whipped it into the tree. Problem solved, or so I thought. Ten minutes and they are back at it, this time it seems louder. I go downstairs and debate my next step. Glass of water or the garden hose. Since the neighbors in front of us are still awake, he is a nurse with weird hours, I opt for the pint vs. hose method. The little f'er is chirping to high heaven, so I douse him. Shut him up good.
Now realize there is actually a great deal of forethought and trepidation involved in this process. First I was somewhat scared because I witnessed a bird of the same make and model as my little chirping friend attack a squirrel yesterday. Yes, he/she/it was divebombing a squirrel and beaking it. I was riding and had a front row view of the bird chasing the squirrel across the street, dippin' & divin' until the squirrel found solace under a shed. So at 1:30am I am thinking I am going to hose down this little monster and then the bird will attack me and beak my eyes out. So now I am blind, bleeding and rolling in the front yard. So I decide the pint cup is my best option. Then I think the super-evil Hitchcockian bird will somehow chase me in the house. Now I am being beaked in my own abode & have to explain to Ames why I have awoken her with my screaming. Yes, there is a lot of thought process that happens at 1:30am to shut up a little varmin. So tonight I will see if the bird will wake me. If he does it again, than Charlton Heston will then be my president, albeit a pellet or BB gun. Charlton would still be proud as I excercise my right to bear BB arms.
Wish me luck.

Be careful what you wish for

My job is very unsatisfying right now. The thrill of short days wears off quickly. There is a possible opening on the horizon. It is a position that I think I would really love. I would work in the PA State Government as a liaison between Lilly and policy makers. Way cool, as I enjoy the nuances of politics and would be more in an advocacy role for open access pharmaceuticals. It would be a huge jump in rsponsibility and pressure. As the role is seen as the make or break person as it relates to making sure Lilly products are covered on State formularies. Definitely a challenge, with a huge upside. Also like any high pressure job there is a huge spotlight that only gets bigger as the shit gets deep. The lady in the position now is feeling that heat. I spoke with her about the job and she said, "be careful what you wish for." "Oh yeah, I also gave you an unconditional recomendation, to take this position." SWEET, I think.
So here I am with a possible major career change in the works, and I need to really sort this out. If I would be offered the position and turn it down, it would probably be career suicide. This is finally a position where I can sit at the big boy table and truly make a difference. Yeah, this is what I want. If it means huge sacrifices for the fall season, so be it. This is the first step to what I want to be when I grow up.

Happy Eve of the Apocalypse

Remember kiddies, tomorrow is 6/6/06. If you have something special to do, do it today. I wonder how many religious right crazies will use this as a platform for moral decline?
Marketing geniuses have already taken advantage of this.
Damien flick opens tomorrow. Cannondale System Six frame is officially launched tomorrow. Hell, MI is throwing a town party.
Maybe I will go to work in red face paint and a pitchfork?
I think I will break out my Iron Maiden, Number of the Beast, cassette in tribute.
Rock on Hellions.