I think that is what my new Match.com "tag line" will be. Since my ex informed me today that my profile is a topic of conversation at her monthly Bunko gathering, I think I am going to go all out and see who I can attract. I will try it out on my loyal readers.
Me: 40, but act like I am MUCH younger. Maybe too young. Hates to travel, unless it is for a bikegame race. Religion is not important, unless I am puking my guts out at Ray & Nancy's wedding & I am praying to God to make it stop. Well read, Velo News, Cycle Sport and the innernet thing. I have never broken a mirror by staring into it. My body is slowly breaking down. Tattooed, probably will get more. Beer is good. Food is good.
Seeking: Really freakin' hot girl. You should probably race bikes, it is basically my life. Let's make it yours as well. Must despise travel also. Your idea of a long trip is three hors by car. Probably should not like the beach either. I get bored and antsy easily. No need to be religious. You may however scream "oh my god, you are great" while in the throws of passion. Be smart, just not smarter than me.
So there it is. My new profile. Seriously, where does one find a good match these days? At what point do I realize, that I am not a model and a girlfriend need not be one either? The bikegame thing is probably a requirement that will stick. Lesson learned. Plus now that I can look at female bikegamers, I realize how hot they are.
Since being thrust into the world of online "dating" I have realized a few things.
1) All the really hot girls are taken
2) Being a cyclist means DIDDLY-POO outside of our naive little cocoon
3) Online dating is predominantly made up of women who are larger than me
4) I have NO idea how to approach women, even online
5) I enjoy my free time
6) The ones who are hot, have two kids
7) Finding an athletic, slender, good looking, single, no kids girl in Central PA is the proverbial needle in a haystack
So to my faithful readers, hook a brutha up. You know a single bikegamer chick, tell her I am available and not an axe murderer.
Don't let the bastards get you down.
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6 comments:
At what point do I realize, that I am not a model and a girlfriend need not be one either?
Probably around the same time you or me or any other racer finally takes it to heart that if you aren't in the Pro-1-2 race, final placing doesn't matter as much as achieving your full potential, even if Full Potential=27th.
I.e. never. Unless you grow up, and that would probably put a crimp in the bike racing.
I know this is bad form to post on your own blog. I am in the P 1,2 events. The past three years I have been 3rd, 3rd & 8th in the PA BAR. All this while working for guys. '05 & '06 I was 2nd ranked crit rider for Cat 2's in PA. '07 was mostly MTB after an eleven year hiatus. I was 7 for 7 in 40+ wins.
Trust me when I say I am pretty in tune with my lot in life.
Mike,
Read on Kuhn's blog you guys had to resod the grounds at Velo-cross.
Who footed the bill for the sod? how did that workout?
Also, the house band at venue thing..email me,I'm working on one right now. I'll fill you in.
Yo man, craigslist exotic services is where you should be looking.
My 2.99 cents... I have been on and off Match.com since... well... it was just me and few dozen geeks sitting behind a computer screen looking for hot chicks, until I stumbled on to my now wifes profile. I have since come up with a handy translation of profiles.
1) yes, all the hot ones have 2 kids.
Not only this but 2) those hot looking pictures are at least 10 years old and they don't look like that any longer.
3) body type: Athletic = Built like a Linebacker, Slim and Slender either means Crack whore skinny or Fat.
4) Piete = Short and fat
5)Likes wine tasings (or simular wording) = Alcholic
6) dosn't look age = "these pictures are so old that you will not be able to reconize me when we meet face to face."
7) likes the out doors = Sits on sofa all day and complains that you never take her (Hiking,Biking,etc).
I have met them all...
Oh yeah one more, TS in the profile = Tranie
Happy model searching...
doesn't like travel? don't you 'travel' every weekend?
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