Thursday, August 24, 2006

Integrity for sale, 40% off

So, I decide I need some new shorts for the beach this weekend. I have not purchased any new shorts lately, so it was high time. I decided the Bon Ton would be my best bet to get some nice casual shorts for a good deal. I get to the shorts section and find a few pair that are my size and are pretty nice. Since I have this hang-up on spending any money on myself, I guess it is common among my "people", I am hoiping the sale price of $40/pair is discounted. I look around to see if there is any sign, anf lo and behold I see a 40% off sign above the Nautica SHIRTS. Well maybe this applies that is a bonus. I go to checkout and a very nice lady helps me out. I am trying to see the screen as she rings my shorts up, and viola 40% off. Sweet. Pair number two gets their attention and whoaaaa nelly. What gives, something is amiss. The formerly nice lady is now questioning me. Sir, this pair comes up as 80% off. Is there an 80% off sign at this rack? Uhhh what to do. " I am not sure?" "I just pulled all the shorts off the same Nautica rack, so I assumed they would be the same price." This is strange she says two pair are 40% off, and this pair is 80% off. They are all the same brand. At this point, I know damn well what the sign said, I also know damn well I was quick on my feet with the "all the same brand, I just figured blah blah blah BS." We have come to a retail impasse. She then gives me this look like, I am going to hook you up. The friendly check-out lady then says, "how about I just ring all of these shorts up at 80% off." What am I to say? No really, I appreciate the hospitality, but I would prefer to pay the extra $30. No, I did what any good retail shopper did. I marked down my integrity by an additional 40%.
Thank you Bon Ton.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006


So I have generally been feeling pretty bummed lately, for a myriad of reasons.
I reached for, Suess-isms: Wise & Witty prescriptions for living from the good doctor.
Being that I am finding less enjoyment in most things of late I decided to see if I could bastardize the good doctor.
Here goes.
Actually I just erased my bastardizations. I think I had an epiphany will reading a children's book.

You have brains in your head
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose
You're on your own
And you know what you know
And YOU are the guy
who'll decide where to go
-Oh the places you'll go

Come on! Open your mouth and sound off to the sky!
Shout loud at the top of your voice,
"I AM I!"
ME! I am I!
And I may not know why
but I know that I like it.
Three cheers! I AM I!
-Happy Birthday to you!

Only you can make your mind up!
You're the one and only one!
-Hunches in Bunches

Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot,
nothing is going to get better.
It's not.
-The Lorax

I meant what I said
I said what I meant
The LEGEND is faithful
One Hundred percent
-Legend hatches the egg

There you have it. Children's book quotes. Pathetic

Better reading: piss your pants funny no holds barred, NC-17 rated you mean you can ride a bike and not race it? Who knew? LOML

Monday, August 07, 2006

Fun in the sun

New race yesterday. Awesome course for a first year race. Yellow line rule shmellow line rule. Yeah, that lasted about 10 minutes. Rippin fast, but easy to sit in. Hacker was an attacking stud yesterday. Went twice, once for about 1 1/2 laps solo. I sat second third wheel and watched him ride. It was impressive. Tried to go once but the filed kept coming then Trey would not work, so that was failed. Two mile to go and I positioned Jared at the front. Swarm hits and Kyle Eckley helps us out before Nate takes over. We were just too far away. Young TSV guys & Ideal Tile guys get jumpy and all hell breaks loose on the little climb. I am positioned well in 6th, then Mike Miller decides today is his day to learn how to sprint & chops the corner, gapping both of us. Fight to get back in line & end up eighth. Jared meanwhile ramps it from a LOOOONG way out and hold for third. I end up ninth. Miller 16th. At least that is what i think the blurry ffinish photo said.
Then off to our very hospitable afternoon hosts Rob & Caroline Hacker for some awesome beer, food & swimming. What a fun afternoon. There was more dry cutting humor in one gathering than at Last Comic Standing audition. Rob crushed the grill with the some aplomb as his race attacks. It was classic when Caroline's mom was busting Rob. "Isn't my son-in-law just the smartest son-in-law." I wish I could remember whar precipitated that exchange, it was priceless. I think Hacker slipped me a BOCA burger instead of a real flesh burger though. My GI was all rumbly for the way home. Rob & Caroline, thanks again for the great afternoon.

Thursday, August 03, 2006


It is on the horizon. 8/27 for a week, then long weekend for Labor Day. The the last of the 30's b-day fete. Well maybe not a fete. Crabs & croquet anyone? Hopefully DK will not sulk this year when he loses again.
Road season is winding down. It has been long and quite successful for myself and the team. Hopefully we can keep it up for another month. Cross is two months away and I am starting to get a little itch. Maybe I will take a week or so off the bike and come into cross really wanting to rip. Last year I was dead. Physically & mentally, I was done at Granogue weekend. Hopefully the more miles and less intensity training I have done this year will be the trick. I have as many miles in now as I did on October 9th of last year. I have not followed a training plan this year, so mentally I am pretty fresh to ride.